So Sam and I are doing a thing
Sam put in for a transfer to WinCo’s warehouse in Modesto. He starts at the end of the month.
I promised Sam I’d serve as moving manager. While this is not my first rodeo, it still took a while for me to figure out a path through this transition. Alan Ginsberg’s first thought may be the best thought, but my first thoughts about how to get us back to California were sort of Beverly-Hillbillies-loading-up-the-truck on steroids.
Then I remembered another great writer, Anne Lamott, and how it’s best to tackle big things bird by bird.
Working through this transition in batches helps lead to better thinking and choices, and finding natural (and more affordable!) supports along the way. For example, Sam will stay the first few weeks in an AirBnB, in a house with rooms that are set up for traveling nurses. I’ll fly out with him to help set up the essentials. An auto transport company will bring his EV a day or two later. He can get a running start at work while I pivot to finding a rental that fits our unconventional family. (I keep stumbling onto farm houses for rent, which I find interesting and cannot wait to learn the back story.)
Working through this transition in little batches leaves room for better reflecting. We remember lessons learned from our prior moves, of course. But sometimes we were just clueless. Mark was a huge fan of “leap and the net will appear.” He wasn’t wrong, but even when you’re young, that kind of blind faith can take a toll.
Doing things in little batches also leaves room for other people’s wisdom. That wisdom makes for better decisions, and it goes a long way to keep fear and anxiety in check. We built a good life here, surrounded by people we love and a community we cherish. We got really comfortable (maybe too comfortable). But Sam saw Texas has some mighty storms on the horizon, storms that could be rough on our unconventional family. When we came to that fork in the road, we knew which way we had to go. Connecting to wisdom helps.
Wisdom welcome below.
You two are inspiring in so many ways. I love that Sam is transferring to a WinCo in another state because it feels right and that you are acting as moving manager. Anne Lamott is wise – break it down into small steps and give yourself grace if things aren’t perfect. Love is guiding you and that’s what matters.
Thanks for the reminder about taking a moment for breathing and grace. I often forget to do that.
I also recommend altering your reading and movie watching while moving stress is high. Instead of serious books I re-read Harry Potter. Instead of Oscar nominees I watched movies for kids & families. I needed to know the problems would be solved and there would be a happy ending. It helped me cope with the major uncertainty of pulling up deep roots and moving halfway across the country. I’m glad I did.
Brilliant! Thank you.
My tidbits on moving wisdom:
– I hope Fang does ok in the move! I got tranquilizers for the cats for one of my many moves. I think it helped some.
– Moving companies won’t move any liquids at all.
– Be aware of movers “extra costs.” I had 99 percent already in boxes for my move here in 2020, but a few garage things were packed into boxes by the movers. I paid dearly for those boxes. It was for things like rakes and shovels. I thought they could just throw those things into the van, loose, but no, they had to box them. And they charged a huge fee to do so.
– They may be late in arriving in Cali. Seems to be always some kind of delay.
Good luck with the move. Denton is going to miss you guys in so many ways. Best to you both in this transition!
These are really good lessons learned. Thank you!
Peggy! I am very envious of your potentially perfect move. Sam has proven he can make decisions and move forward and he has you (and Mark) to thank for that. I wish you both the very best. We think about moving all the time. Maybe, we too, will make that jump. California is lucky to have you !
Some days I’m sad to be leaving friends and question everything. But Sam needs this chance and I’m happy to join in the fun. I love California.
Once again I have to thank you for sharing Sam with me. It was one of the highlights of my life to teach and spend time with him. I am so very proud of him and I know he will do great and wonderful things in CA. He is indeed one of my heroes. Please tell him U2 ….. always, from me.
Thank you, Anita!
This is exciting! I admire your devotion to an awesome life for Sam. Please keep me on the list of those who care and want to know. Good luck on finding the best home. Even if it isn’t the best, you’ll quickly make it great. Safe travels!
I appreciate your faith in us, Gaye. The blog will live on, so stay tuned for updates!