Our extended family has been checking in with one another as we get vaccinated. We are scattered across several states, each with differing priorities and abilities to deliver the vaccine. Still, we cheer each other’s progress as we all approach the finish line.

Texas ignored essential and frontline workers in making its priorities, emphasizing shots for nursing home residents and seniors instead. Texas also got behind other states in getting shots in arms (color me not surprised). As fears rose with the fourth wave of new infections full of variants, I worried that Sam would get sick before Texas got around to vaccinating his age group.

For a while, our best hope seemed that our county was doing a good job in spite of it all. Both Dallas County (with millions of residents) and Denton County (with less than a million) have been holding mass vaccination events and both celebrated the 250,000 mark this week.

As soon as Denton County opened its vaccination list to all adults, I signed Sam up. He was at work when I did. I knew he wanted to take care of it himself, but I told him if we’d waited, even just those few hours for him to get home from work, who knows how many thousands would have gotten in line ahead of him?

The strategy seems to have worked. Sam’s appointment came the first day of the first week for the new cohort—all Texas adults. After he got his appointment, he took the unusual step of group texting his siblings and his aunties with the news. He got the high fives, but his brother and one of his aunties also reminded him that it was a shot and he would feel it.

He needed to talk about that. Sam has been accustomed to the extra steps the nurses at his regular doctor’s office take for inoculations, including applying a topical anesthesia to take the edge off. Knowing that wouldn’t happen at a mass vaccination event made him nervous. I reminded him that his brother and aunt were being very loving by telling him the truth about what to expect.

I did my best to continue the truth-telling by answering his other questions about what to expect since mass vaccinations are different. He asked me to drive him. He said he didn’t think he could manage his anxiety and drive, too. (He is not alone in that. I’ve volunteered at the speedway a few times and have seen plenty of folks shore each other up that way.)

When the moment came and the medical reserve volunteer opened the car door to administer the vaccine, he noticed Sam’s anxiety. We acknowledged it—it was the truth, after all—and he immediately shifted gears to help ease the way for Sam. The volunteer may not have had topical anesthesia, but his care had the same effect. Once inoculated, Sam said he was surprised how easy it was. The volunteer laughed and told him that applying the bandaid was the biggest part of the job. Then they both laughed.

I learned early on that it’s always better to tell Sam the truth. First of all, any child will stop trusting you if you say things like “shots don’t hurt” when you know perfectly well that they do. In addition, when Sam was little, he needed us to bridge him to the rest of the world. We couldn’t afford to be wiggly, amusement park rope bridges. Also, he doesn’t know what to do with white lies or half-truths. (Heck, they used to confuse me, too, but Sam also taught me that if you take people at their word instead of playing along, it’s their turn to be confused.)

Sam has his best shot at identifying and asking for what he needs when we tell the microscopic truth. Don’t we all?

I asked him whether he still wanted me to drive him for his second shot. Yes, please, he said.

6 Comments

  1. Ann Hatch on April 3, 2021 at 6:04 am

    Honesty is the best policy. Practicing that policy can be a challenge some days. Sam serves as a great reminder that we should always strive to follow that rule. Great things can happen!

    • Peggy on April 3, 2021 at 3:12 pm

      Honesty can be tough, I agree. Growing up I often heard people say “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” Dishonesty can also come by omission if you aren’t thinking about the boundary between being polite and being dishonest.

  2. Janemarie Clark on April 3, 2021 at 4:22 pm

    Beautiful. I miss you, sweet lady!

    • Peggy on April 3, 2021 at 4:44 pm

      Miss you, too. We are almost through this.

  3. Annette Fuller on April 4, 2021 at 1:31 am

    Love this! Our extended family has been texting our individual vaccination progress as well. Glad Sam got his and all went well.

  4. Nancy LeMay on April 8, 2021 at 12:46 pm

    A story of love. Everyone in this tale displayed a loving heart.

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