Posts by Peggy
More recipes for kid stuff
Two ways to make finger paints:
Mix liquid starch, 1-2 tablespoons soap flakes, and food coloring in a bowl, whip with a beater. Fill small containers with mixture and add more food coloring to brighten.
Mix 3 tablespoons sugar, 1/2 cup cornstarch together and add 2 cups cold water. Cook over low heat, stirring constantly until well blended. Divide among four or five small cups, add drops of food coloring to color and a pinch of detergent to facilitate clean-up.
An old family recipe
This week the Wolfe house is busy with the making of play-dough on the stove top. The DFW team for Texas Parent-to-Parent will have a booth at the Autism Speaks Walk this Saturday at the Ballpark in Arlington and we plan on giving the kids at the event a super experience for their senses.
I’ve dusted off an old family recipe that was a big hit with Sam when he was little. He was consumed with making sense of the world through his challenged senses. We made this dough, and then added a secret ingredient — a package of unsweetened Kool-Aid to match the color with a flavor “scent.” He loved it.
To wit, put these ingredients in a large saucepan and heat over very low heat, stirring constantly, until it’s thick:
1 cup flour
1/4 cup salt
2 tablespoons cream of tartar
1 cup water
1 tablespoon oil.
Remove from the heat and as soon as you can work the dough with your hands, make a well in the middle and add 1/2 teaspoon of food coloring to match the Kool-Aid flavor. For example — purple and grape; green and lime; red and strawberry; yellow and lemon; and, of course, orange orange and blue blueberry.
The dough keeps for a few days in a rubber keeper or airtight bag. Plus, if your little one takes a bite, you don’t have to worry about any mystery ingredients.
Overheard in the Wolfe House #36
Sam: Let’s go vote.
Peggy: You’re ready? Ok. Let’s go.
Sam: It’s the last day.
A better idea
Sometimes we look askance at parents who put their baby’s name on a waiting list for a prestigious preschool before they are even born.
As if the path to adult success is really that narrow.
Yet, if your child is born with a lifelong condition that will affect their ability to care for themselves, such as Down’s syndrome or autism, parents are encouraged to “guess” what services they might need later in life and put them on a waiting list for services. Those lists, in Texas, are DECADES long.
And recently, Texas created pilot projects for MORE waiting lists for services.
The whole thing is a farce.
Last weekend, at the Njoy Foundation conference, Resources for Parents, I learned about a statewide group that is trying to change the model for Texas. With a bad budget year, they have a mighty, uphill battle.
But it’s got to happen. Last year, 53 people died in state institutions of preventable causes, including one person at the Lubbock facility who was suffocated while being restrained. Of course, nearly every one knows about the notorious “fight clubs” organized by some of the staff at the Corpus Christi facility because one of them recorded the fights on a cellphone.
The Department of Justice has been monitoring Texas facilities for rampant civil rights violations.
To learn more about this group that’s promoting inclusive communities — which means the money follows the client rather than the other way around — visit their website: www.communitynowfreedom.com.
Overheard in the Wolfe House #35
Sam (upon arriving home from the football game): Hungry, hungry, gotta have some pizza. (opens refrigerator) Wow, giant slices. Makes me think of South Carolina.
Making Good Decisions
(The short version of last month’s blog posts)
Parents make decisions about or for their children every day. But parents of kids with special needs often make decisions about their children’s treatment and education long after other kids are well down the road of self-determination. Those decisions, therefore, can have far-reaching effects on a child’s quality of life.
Parents should give some thought to how they make decisions and whether they bring hazardous attitudes or fallacious thinking to the process. With that awareness, these six guideposts can help parents make thoughtful and ethical decisions – and create the best chance for success.
Guidepost 1 – The quality of information affects your decision making
Know what resources are available to you and how to evaluate them. You have rights and responsibilities in gathering and evaluating information – exercise them, because getting the most robust information is the foundation for every other guidepost.
Guidepost 2 — People’s skills and expertise effects decisions and quality of life
If you know the ethical guidelines for the professionals in your child’s life, it helps you recognize if a treatment protocol or interaction is on the edge.
Guidepost 3 – Good decisions depend on the quality of social interactions
When the professionals speak with you, they will use accurate terms and descriptions and the intent and impact of their words will be clear and effective. We parents have responsibility to be an effective member of the entire caregiving team — and, to the best of our ability, solve problems in a positive way.
Guidepost 4 — Family preservation will affect quality life
Most of us are dealing with something that lasts a lifetime, not a few years. Decisions need to keep in mind that this is about the rest of your life, your child’s life, and your family’s life.
Guidepost 5 — Treatment procedure selection will affect quality of life
A treatment choice should have the most constructive, and least restrictive, impact on your child’s life. Make sure you are thinking long-term, with whole-life considerations. Therapists don’t always think 20 years down the road, the way we parents do.
Guidepost 6 — Ethical treatment decisions are readily accountable
For many providers, that means “do good and take data.” For parents, that means a good treatment program with a well-trained provider is going to have some measures that you can see and understand.
The best humble pie
Last night, I shed some major baggage thanks to Sam. We’d spent a long day helping out at a community event. He wanted to say good-bye to one of the organizers because “she’s a very nice lady.”
She’s also very pretty. Sam, like any red-blooded fellow, likes a pretty woman. I teased her husband just a little bit.
“Watch out,” I said.
There was an awkward pause, and then Sam said, “He doesn’t need to watch out.”
Oh, don’t even bother cutting up the crow, just hand it over and I’ll stuff it in there with my foot.
All of my children are gentle souls who have a great deal of respect for personal boundaries. Unlike their father, who was a gentle soul, too, but struggled mightily to keep boundaries where they belong.
I learned last night I don’t own their father’s errors. Not in the least. In fact, I don’t need to watch out at all.
Resources for Parents Conference
For minimal travel, and a low cost ($10 includes lunch), to this new conference in Fort Worth, you can get a more information and help than you would at a resource fair, but without the time demands of a major, all-day, or multi-day event far away.
And in the spirit, I’d better figure out how to trim a 90-minute talk (which was already trimmed from a half-day presentation) to a half-hour …
Overheard in the Wolfe House #34
Peggy: Sam do you have a hole in your work shoes? Do you need new shoes?
Sam: Yes. (pauses) How did you know?
Peggy: I saw your blackened socks on the floor in the laundry room.
Sam (laughing): Yes, I need new shoes.
Overheard in the Wolfe House #33
Sam: What are you doing tomorrow?
Peggy: During the day — not much.
Sam: I get home from work at 2:30. What will you be doing then?
Peggy: Probably outside working in the yard.
Sam: I want to show you Reality Check.
Peggy: Okay.
Sam: It’s time. It’s time to make my major official.